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Aftermath - 2013

September 23, 2013 (refer to July 13, 2014 for the story that lead to this).   My life completely changed.  This was the last time.  I was deceived, abused and willed to be dead by my assailant.  My partner.  The man who proclaimed love to me, but showed me the total opposite.  I had to continue life.  Try to be as normal as possible, but how do I do that?  I wanted to blend into the background, remain unseen.  I just wanted to hide forever.   I was guilt ridden, ashamed, I felt dirty.  I felt like I let my daughter down.  I am her mom, I was supposed to protect her, but I put her in danger.  I felt defeated, unworthy.  Broken. I had a black eye, a broken thumb, fractured forearm, bruises everywhere, I was sleeping in my daughter's living room on an air mattress (bless her heart for loving me).  I had no clothes, no furniture - nothing but felt grateful at the same time that I had my daughter's love, and my ...

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